This is either a great idea or a very painful idea. Mike gave me the perfect setup so I could just blame him.

I'm trying to think of stuff movie fandom will drool for--I mean, besides Hawkeye and Black Widow, I'm way ahead of them on that. I figure i have old school covered, but I need to get the new fan's POV. Suggestions are encouraged. (Brucha already suggested no one will read it unless it's got porn, so suggest something else.)

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

Guys they'd be stupid not to use:

The Vision - One of THE Avengers, right up there with the founders, Hawkeye, and the Scarlet Witch.  There's no excuse not to use him.

Scarlet Witch - Only reason not to use her is if she's tied into Fox's X-Men movie rights.  If the team from the first movie were going to go recruiting, she'd work perfectly as one of the first candidates they'd find.

Black Panther - He's kind of his own guy so I'm not too concerned with whether he's in the Avengers movies or his own movies, but he's badass so Marvel should use every excuse to put him in every movie.  Fits in perfectly with this version of the Avengers--if there's a world-shattering crisis, he'd either be coming to them to help or resolving it before they get to it.

Good Avengers that happen to also balance out all the white dudes:

The Wasp - I assume she's a lock for whatever Hank Pym/Ultron story they have to be considering down the road.

Carol Danvers/Monica Rambeau - I figure they'd only use one, and either way she'd probably incorporate elements from the other.  I like 'em both, so it makes no difference to me.

Moondragon/Mantis - Same deal; you could tweak either of them to say the other's lines, so it just comes down to which one you prefer. 

Falcon - He's a good guy, but his most memorable Avengers run was the time he was forced onto the team to fill a quota, so I think he'd have the stigma of being a token hanging over him.  Maybe introduce him a Captain America sequel first, like...

War Machine - Everybody already knows who he is and likes him, so that's a plus.  Trouble is he'd look redundant on a team with Tony, and they're not writing Tony out of this team.

Tigra - Not a personal favorite, but she's got a unique style that wouldn't feel like a retread of  the guys they've got.

My sentimental favorites who have no chance:

The Black Knight - Sorely underrated, likely to stay that way.  Huge missed opportunity to feature Blue Oyster Cult on the soundtrack.

Beast - It is a proven fact that Avengers Beast > X-Men Beast, but I don't see Fox loaning him out.  Also we've got enough goofy smart guys on this team.

Hercules - More fun than Thor, but unless Chris Hemsworth quits in a huff, it's not happening.

Sersi - Also fun (in a psycho ex-girlfriend sort of way) but no director in the world is gonna pass on Wanda, Jan, or Carol to indulge nostalgia for the 1990s Bob Harras leather jacket Avengers.



Gilgamesh The Forgotten One - Was a really stupid idea to make an Avenger.  That is the ending of that sentence.

I can't sit here and say Avengers is a great movie, but it's clearly not trying to be.  All it's trying to do cross over four other movie franchises, introduce some new IP to the audience, and blow shit up in a charming way.  I think it succeeds in this admirably.  Like Thor and Captain America it is simply a good movie featuring those characters you always wanted to see in a movie, and that's enough for me.  (I think I wrote on MightyGodKing.com last year that I'll take Spider-Man 2 or The Incredibles if I can get it, but when it comes to superhero movies in general I'm relieved if I get something that doesn't bore or anger me.)

Also, Marvel is hurting itself by faking me out with the post-credits sequences.  There's one right as the credits start, so after that I figured I could leave, and then when I got home I heard about a second.  So if you haven't seen the movie because you're currently observing Bein ha-Metzarim or something, stay until the ushers kick you out because there may well be dozens of post-credits sequences.

Deeper thoughts under the cut.

( Spoiler: The Avengers beat up the bad guys )

Things I am good at:

1. Liking the Avengers a lot.

Things I am not good at:

1. Planning to attend a movie.

You can perhaps see my dilemma.  I spent all day at work wishing I could watch the Avengers movie right now and then as soon as I got home and didn't have to fantasize about not working I lost my motivation.  Netflix is way easier than movies.  (Did you know Patrick Stewart did a PBS movie based on Macbeth?  It's pretty decent.)

You would think this would not be so complicated because out of all the Marvel comics they've ever turned into movies, Avengers is my most favoritest one.  Unless Disney decides that Thunderbolts versus Spaceballs is a good idea for a movie, this is probably as good as I'm ever gonna get. 

Anyway, I've spent all day slacking off on this so I'm committing to driving to the theater TONIGHT at 9.  This is going to be interesting because I've read, like, almost all of the comics, so we'll see if it lives up to my ridonkulous standards.  I mean, this is SERIOUS BUSINESS for me.

Oh man, this is like when that first X-Men movie came out.  Except it's happening TO ME.  Yeah, now you're all going to learn what Jim knew all along, you bastards.

Earlier this week the NRA posted a video in which Ted Nugent explained that "If Barack Obama "becomes the president in November again, I will either be dead or in jail by this time next year."  (Since Obama wouldn't begin his second term until January, I guess we don't have to worry about this scenario.)  Unsurprisingly, the Secret Service decided to drop by and have a talk with him about that.

The Secret Service has a responsibility to take possible threats to national leaders very seriously, even when it may seem rather silly, and so I don't fault them for doing their jobs.  What I do find absurd is the outcry against Nugent in the general public for "threatening" the president.  You can read the comment that way, but only if you frame it in the left's most paranoid fever dreams about the right--that gun-toting assholes like Nugent have no regard for rule of law and are one short fuse away from effecting regime change with a rifle. 

It's important to remember that Nugent said the comment in the context of his paranoid fever dreams about the left--that nanny-state socialists are taking over the world but are uniquely frustrated by his personal resistance, and will inevitably pull a Waco siege on his ass.  In his mind he and his ilk are the victims in this scenario.  This should be obvious to anyone who's spent even a minute listening to right-wing hyperbole--these guys see themselves as martyrs, not assassins.  Hell, the same is true on the left--if Michael Moore predicted that he'd be in Gitmo six months after Bush was re-elected, he'd surely mean "as a political prisoner," not "for shooting the president."

All that having been said, I find it hilariously hypocritical that Nugent used a different spin about the Secret Service interviewing him, saying he respects their duty and salutes them.  This gives the lie to all that right-wing apocalyptic fuming about the left, and exposes Nugent's earlier comments as nothing but empty words he uses to stir people up.  If Nugent really thought the president was out to get him (presumably for loving freedom too much or something), then he'd realize this is totally how the president would get him.  You'd think he'd be sequestering himself in his home, preparing all the survivalist junk he probably has, getting ready for the ATF tanks and tear gas.  But he's not going to do any of that stuff because he knows that would make manifest the problem he only wants to pretend is there.  So of course he's got no beef with the Secret Service; they're brave men and women doing a great service to this country.  And yet somehow their boss is an evil man who is somehow completely subverting every aspect of government, except the ones he likes.